Little Leaders

HABIT 1: Be Proactive means to take responsibility for your choices and behaviors. Habit one is the key to all other habits; Be Proactive says, “I am in charge of my own life. I am responsible for whether I am happy or sad. I can choose how to react to other people or situations.

Family activities:  Role play the following situations with your child

• (Play the part of your child’s friend)  Say that you have a new best friend who lives close to your house and you don’t want to play with him or her anymore.  Apologize then wait for your child’s reaction.
• (Play the part of your child’s sibling)  Tell you child that you broke his or her favorite toy by accident.  Tell him or her that you don’t think it’s a very big deal because he or she has many toys.
• (Play the part of the child and have your child play the part of you) Tell your child that you are “sooooo bored” and there is nothing fun to do.  Complain that no one wants to play and that he or she needs to amuse you.  

HABIT 2:  Begin With the End in Mind means to think about how you would like something to turn out before you get started.  Have a plan.

Family activities:  Create a family mission statement

1. Get started on your family constitution by discussing the following questions with your family:
   • What does your family want to be known for?
   • How do we treat each other?
   • What big goals do we want to achieve?
   • What unique talents and skills do we have?
2. Brainstorm ideas, words and phrases to include in the mission statement.  Remember no idea is a bad idea.
3. Begin crafting your statement, but remember, it doesn’t have to be finished in one sitting.  
4. Post the statement prominently in home and encourage the entire family to consider it when making decisions or having disputes.

HABIT 3:  Put First Things First means to decide what is most important and to take care of that first. Learning to think of which things are the most important and taking care of them first allows children (and adults) to be less stressed. By writing down his or her respon- sibilities and planning ahead, last-minute trips to the store, missed events, or missed homework are avoided.

Family Activities:  Model

• Create a list of things your child needs to accomplish throughout a week.  With your child, rank the tasks in importance.  Then rewrite the list in order of importance.  Use a planner or calendar to schedule time so that the important things are done first.
• Role play with your child about the consequences of forgetting to study for a math test.  How will your child feel?  What are the consequences?  Then role-play how it will feel to be well prepared and get a great math score!
• Encourage your child to design or decorate this/her own planner or weekly activity log.

HABIT 4: Think Win-Win is the belief that everyone can win. It’s not me or you—it is both of us. It is a belief that there are enough good things for everyone. As a parent, not everything is negotiable, but if you go into discus- sions with your child with a win-win mindset, you’ll find a lot less resistance.

Family Activities:

• Play a game with your child that has a definite winner.  Explain how competition is okay when you play a game, but it is not okay in relationships.  Discuss how tense it would be in your home if every situation had to have a winner.  A better way to think is win-win.  This means we think of solutions that we can all feel good about when there is a problem.  The more we Think Win-Win, the fewer problems there will be.  You may want to display a chart listing the days of the week.  When someone “caught” thinking win-win, he or she gets to write his or her name on the chart for that day.
• Encourage win-win solutions to sibling disputes.  Don’t always be the mediator; let them work out a solution and be sure to be lavish children with praise when they do.

HABIT 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood means that it is better to listen first and talk second. By taking the time to listen to another person, you reach a higher level of communication. Learning to listen without interrupting and learning to listen with your ears, your eyes, and your heart will help children build a foundation for Habit 5.

Family Activities:  

• To better understand how listening can help or hurt a relationship, try “pretend listening” with your child for a few minutes.  Your child will be frustrated.  Explain what you were doing and discuss how your child felt.  Now have your child ignore you when you are talking.  Discuss how it makes you feel when you are ignored.  Finish the discussion by thinking of ways to let the other person know what you feel you are not being truly listened to.  Remind your child that this is also an example of Think Win-Win.
• Body language can be even more important than words.  play a game with your kids where you each try to guess the other’s emotion without using words just body language.
• Demonstrate how saying the same phrase in a different tone of voice can give the phrase a completely different meaning.  Try emphasizing different words in the phrase “I didn’t say you did it” and then have your child tell you how the meaning changed.

HABIT 6: Synergize is when two or more people work to- gether to create a better solution that either would have thought of alone. It’s  not your way or my way, but a better way.

Family Activities:

• With your children, choose a problem you may have.  Use a Synergy Action Plan to summarize your child’s solution and your solution:  STAR S-State the problem, T-Think about ways to solve the problem, A-Apply the best solution together, R-Reflect on how it all went.  See if you can reach a better solution (the High Way) than either of you would have come up with alone.
• Institute a “15-minute program” where everyone drops why they are doing and pitches in to work as a team to clean the kitchen, pull weeds int he garden, wash the dishes, sweep, etc.  Cutting out a small block of time where everyone helps make the work go quicker.
• If your child has siblings, ask each to identify what they think their brother or sister is really good at, then share the lists with each other and discuss how they could Synergize on homework, chores, playing games, etc.  If your child does not have siblings, you can do the same exercise using his or her best friends- or you. 

HABIT 7:  Sharpen the Saw means to have balance in your life. Explain the four parts of each person (body, brain, heart, and soul) and how important it is to take care of each part to make them all work better.

Family Activities:  

• Develop a Sharpen the Saw activity center in your home, include arts and crafts supplies, learning games, puzzles, classical music, books, etc.
• Discuss various ways to Sharpen the Saw in all areas.  Ideas might include: Body (playing outside, riding your bike), Brain (balancing reading with TV watching or making smarter choices about what you watch), heart (making a list of what makes you happy and doing something on the list every day, spending time with special friends and family), and soul (attending religious services, starting a journal).

You are your child’s first and best teacher. You lay the foundation for the education of your child’s mind, heart, body, and spirit. You can help your son or daughter discover the leader within and prepare for a great life of contribution and service.

By reinforcing these 7 Habits at home, you will be supporting your child’s future success for years to come.

Here are a few tips to ensure your success:

3. Read together: